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Freaked Out American Loser

by Juiceboxxx

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credits

released July 28, 2017

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Track Name: Freaking Out
Out of my mind but I'm a hell of a guy
I got the PMA that's just an FYI
I got a J-O-B and that's to stay alive
24/7 not 9 to 5

One time like 'Clef on The Fugees Joint
Rhyme spit like a loogie just to prove my point
Three times 'til I'm givin' up
Rhymes never stiffin up
When I'm on the mic I got no choice but to flip it up

Counted out so many times I can't count
They try to pick my style but yo that's when I dip out
Mental state start to slip out
But I can't trip out
Jumping out the bed then I ship out

29 but I'm 30 in my minds eye
Rhyme fly
Looking in the mirror like who am I?
It's Juiceboxxx in this motherfucker
Feeling weird, feeling strange
Feeling fuckin' in the gutter
But I keep on going like no other
Dive bar, cheap cover

Freaking out
Freaking out
I'm motherfucking freaking out

Let me tell you something from a while ago
I went from city to city to fuckin' show to show
Look at me like a fuckin' UFO
But there's a couple little things that you don't know
Raps feed back like a rocker's amp stack
Got a couple bucks where the taco truck at
Front seat of a fuckin' four door hatchback
Psycho flashback
See you who laughs last
Wasted mind like a broken laugh track
Sit com bomb and I'm on my last gasp
Gotta get away
Gotta get away

Freaking out
Freaking out
I'm motherfucking freaking out

You hit the stage
And yo you swallow your pride
You're really broken down
But the dream never died
You saw it all through when you were just a kid
But you could never get out and you could never get rid
Of all the feelings inside it's gonna ruin your life
And you can't think right and you cant act right
You're out of the light but yo you still gotta fight
Freaking out, freaking out, freaking out
Tonight

Time for the rhyme to ignore the pain
Got a one way ticket on a midnight train
And I'm not going back yo it's so deranged
But it's never gonna, never gonna, be the same
Just can't stop if it's in your sight
Life long loser but you choose to fight
Even for a second wanna feel alright
Freaking out, freaking out, freaking out
Tonight
Track Name: Brutalizing
Lock the door
Kill the light
I'm not getting out
Until I feel alright

So I'm all alone and I just don't know
Don't like fun and I got no dough
Looking for a reason
But the reason don't come
And I'll tell you if it comes
But it might not come

It's never gonna be the same
It's never gonna be the same
1, 2, 3, 4

The life keeps brutalizing
Look into my eyes everyday I'm dying
This life keeps brutalizing
And I gotta get away now, hit me

Brutalizing

Coming to terms
With everything inside
It ain't overnight
It's a life long ride
Bash your brain and bash your life
Get back up and try to make it right

No control over what you know
Total confusion and it rips your soul
In your head, takes a toll
But it's time to go, it's time to go

It's never gonna be the same
It's never gonna be the same
1, 2, 3, 4

The life keeps brutalizing
Look into my eyes everyday I'm dying
This life keeps brutalizing
And I gotta get away now, hit me

I think I wanna freakout right now
Track Name: Go To The Club Alone
When you got nowhere to go
You gotta go to the club alone

Go to the club alone
Your phone's dead now
Fucked up in the motherfucking head now
Freaked out but you can't get to bed now
In the dark alone you feel the dread now

Riding on the bus after midnight
And all the kids don't give a shit right
But you know that you gotta keep your shit tight
All alone at the motherfucking club night

You sleep all day you stay out late
And deep inside you can feel the head
Coming at yourself, going in your soul
But yo you gotta go

When you got nowhere to go
You gotta go to the club alone

Go to the club alone

Standing in the corner
Like a freak
You wanna feel better but the fear's so deep
So you blow all your money
And you blow all your mind
You blow all your hearing
And you waste all your time

Go to the club alone

Close my eyes and blow my eardrums
Don't get it twisted motherfucker I'm dumb
I hate myself and I hate my life
So freaked out and I pay the price

I'm only in the club cuz my life sucks
Get up early in the corner paying 5 bucks
People think I'm dealing cuz I got a fuckin' flip phone
Stone cold sober but I'm out of my dome

Juiceboy comin' and I'm never at home
Jumping on the bus insane in my brain zone
Try to run away but you're already gone
When you go to the club alone

When you got nowhere to go
You gotta go to the club alone

Go to the club alone
Track Name: Destruction And Redemption
Destruction and Redemption
Freak out, it's never ending

Tunnel vision running through the dark
No way back, there's no second start
Rip it up then you break apart
It's never ending and it's in your heart

Do you wanna live your life?
Do you wanna do what's right?

Destruction and Redemption
Freak out, it's never ending

Diggin' deep down til you hit the wall
Every single day I can hear the call
Free my head, man, I wanna destroy
Freaking out you know I got no choice

Destruction and Redemption
Freak out, it's never ending

I wanna change my life

Destruction and Redemption
Freak out, it's never ending

Destruction
Track Name: Guts and Tension
All I got is the Guts and Tension
Running like a loser in the wrong direction

Grown ass man with a dumb ass name
I hit the road and I go insane
You wanna know what's inside of my brain
I never change but I'm never the same

On the stage
It's never on my mind
Your never understand
Because it's all of the time

You need an explanation
For the way I rhyme
The way I live
You're never gonna find

When I compromise
It makes me wanna die
Living like a lie
Just trying to get by
Look me in the eye
Look me in the face
Back to the belly of the beast
Just trying to chance
Dreams

Do you understand what I really mean?
This is all I got and it's killing me
I tried to fuck around with auxiliaries
You gotta be motherfucking kidding me

All I got is the Guts and Tension
Running like a loser in the wrong direction

They try to peg me down
They try to throw me away
They try to figure me out
But their not far away

Not for you man, it's not for me
It's bigger than the things that you want it to be

Yeah, yo it's ticking in my brain like a timebomb
Dream's dying but I'm holding til the line's gone
And I'm trying but I fail so my mind's gone
I just wanna survive

All I got is the Guts and Tension
Running like a loser in the wrong direction

Oh my god man, it's not the same
Got the Guts and Tension running thru my brain

Yeah, tried to get out but I think I want back in
Rock and roll, man I can't stop rapping
Even though yo it's never gonna happen
Hit the road hit the stage start attacking

Gotta have guts but it's not the same
Always in my life have I felt deranged
But maybe one time when I rock the stage
I'm gonna fucking break, yeah

All I got is the Guts and Tension
Running like a loser in the wrong direction
Track Name: Lifers And Losers
I can feel it coming
Never gonna stop
Try to run away
Try to get a job
I can feel it coming
Oh it's popping out my veins
Make me wanna think weird
Jumping a train

To all the lifers and the losers

Running in a circle
I feel it in my mind
Through a sea of bullshit
Stranded on the line

Coming and coming and coming and coming
But not me, man

To all the lifers and the losers
To all the lifers
Track Name: Permanent Brain Damage
PBD
Read between the lines
I'm not doing fine
Man I'm out of my mind
Think I woke up with a bad concussion
Feel motherfucked, yo my brain is rushing
Rushing, rushing, rushing, rushing, rushing, rushing, rushing
Yelling and yelling but man I ain't sayin' nothing

Yelling in my ear, yelling in my face, yelling in my brain
And I wanna go insane
In and out of the darkness
Don't know where to start or stop
Or when the dark hits
But when it hits man it won't quit
You gotta hold on tight through all the bullshit
PBD gonna fuck with me
PBD it's catching up with me
PBD gonna fuck with me, gonna fuck with me, gonna fuck with me

PBD in the h-e-d
I got the PBD in the h-e-d

Stupid motherfucker
And I hate my ways
I try to play it cool
Through all the crazy days
Running in my mind man it start to blaze
The years go by but it's all a haze

PBD do you even know?
PBD never gonna go
PBD do you even know
Do you even know
Do you even know

PBD in the h-e-d
I got the PBD in the h-e-d

Rock all night and I rock all day
I got the PBD in the USA
Track Name: No Good Way To Grow Up
Feel so low
I don't really know
But I can't keep living like this
People say they know
But they don't really know
The difference tween the fact
And the myth

No good way
No good way to grow up
Take it from me man I know
People like us oh no you know we're so fucked
Wasted our life at the show

Looking at your life like you could wish it all away
Looking at your past oh man it seems like yesterday
Looking at the words and all the stupid shit they say
It's not you

No good way
No good way to grow up
Out of my mind
I wanna die, I wanna throw up

Think I really gotta get away
No good way to grow up
Track Name: Freaked Out American Loser
Took a bus to the gold line
I think I'm starting to crack
I've been talking bout leaving this town
And never coming back

Saw your car in the driveway
I was on the couch
Got a couple things in my soul
That I could never get out

And it keeps breaking, it keeps breaking, it keeps breaking
Away from me
It keeps breaking away

Another wasted winter
Going down the drain
You tried to get your shit together
But you went insane
And in the middle of the night
I was feeling alright
I could see so clear
But then I woke and I was all alone
Fuckin' buried in fear

And it keeps breaking, it keeps breaking, it keeps breaking
Away from me
It keeps breaking away

Freaked Out American Loser

And it keeps breaking, it keeps breaking, it keeps breaking
Away from me
It keeps breaking away

Don't go away, don't go away from me baby

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